Aliens, you say? That’s not confirmed, but there’s plenty of other weird stuff going on at Area 51 in Nellis Air Force Base, Nevada, even without aliens. Join me as I get to the bottom of what’s hiding at Area 51 and why – the answers may surprise you!
Continue reading “New at Spookwire: What’s in Area 51 worth storming?”
Well, I’m more than on-record as a long-standing Magic: the Gathering geek. But that’s the paper cards. When it comes to the electronic offerings of Wizards of the Coast trying to replicate their paper game in video media, there’s no point in trying to be nice about it: They all stink on ice. After a token attempt to get MTG Arena to run on ANY device I own by ANY means necessary, I lost interest, as I have so many times before. So dismissed has been the video game interpretations of MTG from my consideration, that this is my first time talking about them at all, anywhere.
But have you seen this new MTGArena ad? I saw it on YouTube and was too paralyzed with horror to hit the ‘skip’ button. Good GAWD, people, what the WTF were you THINKING???
There’s so much gone so wrong to unpack here, I barely know where to start…
Continue reading “MTG Arena has the worst ad for anything, ever”
Look, folks, I don’t always get to pick the topic, OK? Clients want stuff, I give them stuff. So when political season inevitably reared its scab-encrusted head, I did my painful duty. So here’s a scorecard of the current contenders for Democratic president 2020.
Bottom line: Front-runner wins, everybody else GTFO! I dress it up in my characteristic snark, of course, but the nut of the matter is we lost 2016 because the only thing a Democrat seems to hate worse than a Republican is another Democrat. When Republicans are onstage, all I hear are people ripping up Democrats. When Democrats are on stage, all I hear are people ripping up Democrats. We need allies, not saboteurs.
I don’t care who’s polling at the top, if it’s a fireplug, everybody else needs to bow out, shut up, drop out, and throw their support behind the fireplug! This is the easiest election to win ever! All you have to do is present a united front.
Bill Maher points it out: “All the Democrats have to do is come off LESS CRAZY THAN TRUMP and of course they’re blowing it!”
Please, people, save your petty little tent agendas for some other year. This is a life and death election. We are amidst a Cold Civil War. Our nation’s soul is at stake. The Titanic is sinking and Democrats can’t stop fighting over how to redecorate the underwater ballroom.
So this was a weird experimental post based on my starting an argument in which I held the position that you can make an Amazon product list out of anything. “Anything?” they said. “Anything, just pick something,” I said. So they said “something for the spiritual category.” And then I was naming the Flying Spaghetti Monster and Bob J.R. Dobbs and they went “Wait a minute, maybe this isn’t such a good idea.” But I said “Too late! Things have been set in motion which cannot be undone!”
And that’s how we got a list of Best Devotional Items For Alternative Religions. With a bonus section where I introduce my own alternative religion: the Cult of the Temponaut! I hope one day to have my cult grow to a world-wide viral phenomenon, just like all the wacky cults we deal with already. I mean, mine is mostly benevolent and nobody can get hurt in it, right? Ah well, we’ll find out, omelets and eggs.
Just remember, physicists have reversed time already using a quantum computer. That’s how you get Temponauts! Start showing them respect before you have to deal with them all at once.
Yes, I know, worshiping the temple of e-Commerce is a bit far out of my usual wheelhouse, where I’m typically frolicking with Cthulhu or posting unhinged rants against palm trees. But guess what, chicken butt: Your humble author has to eat too, and articles about Amazon Prime Day brings in the bacon.
It’s funny, too, because for all the vitriol Amazon draws, it’s really just the online version of Sears-Roebuck. Present your case, John Oliver:
Now my case:
Continue reading “New at 123ish: Amazon Prime Day, your corporate overlord report”
So apparently, the late H.P. Lovecraft has gained new-found popularity with younger generations, even though he was about as politically correct as Archie Bunker. Over at Suggested Reads, a new site for discovering quality literature, I had the opportunity to at last dive into the works of Lovecraft and ink out a map for the first-time Arkham tourist.
Continue reading “New at Suggested Reads: HP Lovecraft Books That’ll Give You Nightmares”
I’m sure my steady readers will be familiar with my taste for horror movies. My latest shingle is hung over at Spookwire, a site dedicated to the paranormal and eerie events of all kinds.
Join us this time for 5 Terrifying Horror Movies Inspired By True Events! You were expecting the Winchester Mystery House or the Dyatlov Pass Incident… but what is Freddy Kruger doing there?
Click on for bonus buck content…
Continue reading “New at Spookwire: Five Horror Movies Inspired By True Events”
Hold onto your prayer beads, late-night browsers, because I’ve got a new gig that’s destined to scare the wits out of you! I’ll be blogging for Spookwire, a new site dedicated to the creepy, unexplained, and paranormal. From horror movies to conspiracy theories and every real-life intrigue in between, if it’s spooky, we do it!
So to one of our opening posts: The Eerie Mystery Of Phantom Social Workers. This has been a real-life event in the UK and US, and was related to a media circus on both sides of the pond. I touch on the US Satanic Panic of the 1980s and 1990s, with the McMartin Preschool “trial,” and the gigantic Scotland Yard investigation over in the UK.
In brief, parents have reported home visits from people claiming to be social workers, who examine the home and threaten to take away the kids. But later calls to the government reveal no such persons worked there and no social welfare visits scheduled. So where do they come from, and what do they want? It’s a chilling question with some alarming theories to answer it.
Anybody out there remember the elder days of yore on the web, when I was one of the few bloggers to talk about Linux and FOSS? I figured it’s time to update distro recommends for a new generation. So here’s the top five Linux distros for every kind of user.
As usual, I dodged the trendy meme distros in favor of time-honored practical systems for anybody from the most clueless newbie to the salty veteran power user. Wow, it has been a long time!
Follow on for one of my classic Linux essays, the final battle report of the Microsoft vs. Linux wars:
Continue reading “You know what I haven’t blogged about in awhile? LINUX!”
After far, far too long a time, I finally popped the movie Dark Star (1974) off the reader-requested review queue at 366 Weird Movies. Not only is it a long-standing cult favorite for being the first theatrical release for both John Carpenter and Dan O’Bannon when they were still film students, it’s also a quirky and unique sci-fi comedy whose “hippies in space” motif is just enough to flirt with the list of weirdest movies of all time.
