The Well of Wishes awaits in the Crypt of Decay

I'm Bored! What's In The Searchbag?

Date/Time Permalink: 11/08/07 08:03:18 am
Category: Searchbag

Cue the dancing kangaroos in tutus! Fire up the credenza! Split a spliff, smoke some schwag, and tune your boogaloo kazoo! As your Master of Ceremonies takes the balcony, turns to the peanut gallery and says:

Hello, True Believers! It's time once again to pull up a few items from the search-bag, that list of search terms tracked by my b2evolution stats which show some of the phrases which landed people on this site via a search engine. What I'm mostly interested in are the "near-misses" - those phrases which show that the searcher came here looking for something that was almost, but not quite, entirely unhere.

I'm also interested in filling space...

"desktop toilet full" - What an excellent name for a desktop recycle bin. Right-click and select "flush". Click "yes" to the hysterical dummy box that asks "Are you SURE you want to flush these (x) items?" as if these were priceless treasures from the Smithsonian. By the way, I think all real-life trashcans should include a voice chip that asks "Are you SURE you want to throw this away?" every time something lands in them.

"forbidden code download ebook" - Yes, I have an ebook of forbidden code. Many, in fact. But if I let you download it, then it wouldn't be forbidden, nooooow, would it?

"set animated png as linux background" - OK, one more time with feeling: PNGs cannot animate. GIFs can. And you can set a GIF as a desktop background, but guess what? It won't animate. It will stay stuck on the first frame. This is because the thing that does the animating isn't embedded into the image file itself, but is in fact part of the web browser engine. The GIF file only contains the data to tell the web browser how to animate it.

"html codes hearts spades etc" - That would be:

  • &#9824 for spades
  • &#9827 for clubs
  • &#9829 for hearts
  • &#9830 for diamonds

...and what's with the "etc"? Was Google supposed to fill in the rest of your query?

"local rat killer in logic circuit" - I have no idea which alternate dimension would hold the answer to this query, nor would I dare to guess what problem provoked the search. Here's the Wikipedia entry on Harry Harrison's "The Stainless Steel Rat" series - is that any help?

"linux excuses" - "It's still compiling." "The partition needs to be fscked." "The file couldn't preserve the permissions when I wrote it back to VFAT." "Adobe won't port that." "The site is blocking Firefox." "I couldn't decide whether to use Qt or GTK and gave up in frustration." "The only editors on the system are Emacs and vi and I'm strictly a Pico person." "Stallman doesn't like that license." "This is fresh out of CVS nightly." "Wine doesn't run that yet." "I catted /dev/random to /etc/magic and turned into a frog."

You get the idea...

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